EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: It’s time for Boris Johnson’s awards

EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: It’s time for Boris Johnson’s awards

Boris Johnson‘s resignation honors list is ‘approved and ready to go’, I hear.

The late Queen’s Lord Chamberlain, Baron ‘Chips’ Maclean (1971-1984), suggested that Prime Ministers should award their own medals to keep the monarch and the honors system away from scandal.

Nothing came of the idea.

EPHRAIM HARDCASTLE: Boris Johnson’s (pictured September 12) resignation honors list is ‘signed and ready to go’, I hear

Three Degrees star Sheila Ferguson will discuss her ‘complicated’ relationship with King Charles in a long-promised autobiography.

She suggested there was no irregularity: ‘I didn’t want to be a notch on his bed.

“I valued myself a little more than that.”

Judging by the photo of them together at Charles’ Privy Council accession ceremony, the cheerful-looking 71-year-old Gordon Brown is weathering life’s storms better than 69-year-old Tony Blair, who seems to have dyed his hair without success.

Judging by the photo of them together at Charles' Privy Council accession ceremony, a cheerful-looking Gordon Brown, 71, is weathering life's storms better than frowning Tony Blair , 69, who appears to have dyed her hair unsuccessfully

Judging by the photo of them together at Charles’ Privy Council accession ceremony, a cheerful-looking Gordon Brown, 71, is weathering life’s storms better than frowning Tony Blair , 69, who appears to have dyed her hair unsuccessfully

Sir Rod Stewart’s statuesque wife, 6ft 1in, Penny Lancaster, remembers having to walk alongside our 5ft 10in King Charles after a dinner party: “He commented on my height, so I said: “I can do something about this”, and took my shoes off.

“He held my hand as we walked.”

Probably humming Da Ya by Sir Rod Think I’m Sexy?

Speaking to Tory leadership candidate Penny Mordaunt as she made her debut as leader of the House of Commons, Labor MP Chris Bryant added a sly dig: ‘I warmly welcome her to her new job – not least because she has to be a leader after all.’

He was once known as Captain Underpants after posing in his Y-fronts on a dating site.

Now it’s Captain Smartypants.

BBC International Editor Jeremy Bowen slams his ex-colleague Emily Maitlis, saying it was ‘appropriate’ for business mandarins to ‘discuss with her’ his controversial monologue about the ex-advisor No. 10 Dominic Cummings.

She should have written it “a little smarter,” he remarks.

We do not care? Licensing fee payers might be more interested in why the BBC needs a world affairs editor (John Simpson), a chief international correspondent (Lyse Doucet) and an international editor (Bowen).

Bewigged Tory MP Michael Fabricator said he backed Liz Truss for the top job because Rishi Sunak failed to respond to calls from West Midlands Mayor Andy Street for the ‘life partner’ of the resident clown of the House of Commons.

He gloats: “I was on a North American walking holiday with Andy and the number of phone calls he received from Liz Truss was remarkable!”

After dubbing Boris Johnson The Convict, The Guardian now calls his successor Librium Liz, referring to a drug used to treat anxiety disorders.

Without a doubt, his arrival at No. 10 has nervous left-handers on paper looking for their Librium tablets.

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Edward L. Robinett